I don’t know why this happened to me. Why my Suryan did this to me. Why I have lost everything. I know one year is a long time, I didn’t realise it will change forever. I had everything last April when I was wishing for her birthday, this year nothing. I don’t have anything.
Why can’t I forget her? Everytime I think of her I can’t stop crying. I can’t control myself and the tears just pours down the face. I logged in just so I can dish out all my sadness into this blog.
Whenever I go to sleep I will end up crying. I try hard not to, but I can’t. I love her so much that I can’t think of anything else. As I dont go out of my room its hard. I know she has not done anything wrong. Anyone would have done the same thing. But still I can’t stop myself from thinking about her. I know I don’t have the right to think about her anymore, but I can’t stop myself. I have so many memories that it does not go away.
In my heart I had married her and she is my wife. Now she is dead, that’s what I think to myself. I got all her emails, all the sms she sent me and her picture in my room. Thats enough for me.
People might say that I lived only 2 days with her, but that’s enough for me.
But I would like her to talk to me as a friend atleast.
I know I am wrong, but if loving her and living with her memories is wrong then I don’t want to be right.
Why can’t I forget her? Everytime I think of her I can’t stop crying. I can’t control myself and the tears just pours down the face. I logged in just so I can dish out all my sadness into this blog.
Whenever I go to sleep I will end up crying. I try hard not to, but I can’t. I love her so much that I can’t think of anything else. As I dont go out of my room its hard. I know she has not done anything wrong. Anyone would have done the same thing. But still I can’t stop myself from thinking about her. I know I don’t have the right to think about her anymore, but I can’t stop myself. I have so many memories that it does not go away.
In my heart I had married her and she is my wife. Now she is dead, that’s what I think to myself. I got all her emails, all the sms she sent me and her picture in my room. Thats enough for me.
People might say that I lived only 2 days with her, but that’s enough for me.
But I would like her to talk to me as a friend atleast.
I know I am wrong, but if loving her and living with her memories is wrong then I don’t want to be right.
I have lived almost a year now and I will forever. I would have done the same thing if I had married her and if she had died in few months. So I can do the same thing. I dont want anybody my parents or friends or family.
1 comment:
Good post.
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